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Updated for 2026 · 2,071+ hand-picked jokes

Funny Jokes That Are Actually Funny

2,000+ hand-picked jokes across 23 categories — dad jokes, knock-knock jokes, one-liners and more. No scrolling through 40 duds to find one good laugh.

Browse 23 Categories

📆 Joke of the day

Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field.

See every day’s joke →

Explore Every Category

23 categories

From groan-worthy dad jokes to spooky Halloween zingers — every joke on FunnyJokes.fun is hand-picked. No filler, no repeats, no duds.

↗ 👨 Dad Jokes 130 jokes ↗ 🚪 Knock Knock Jokes 95 jokes ↗ 🎃 Halloween Jokes 100 jokes ↗ ⚡ One-Liner Jokes 125 jokes ↗ 🌚 Dark Jokes 80 jokes ↗ 🌽 Corny Jokes 100 jokes ↗ 😅 Bad Jokes 90 jokes ↗ ⚡ Short Jokes 110 jokes ↗ 😄 Puns 100 jokes ↗ 🤔 What Do You Call Jokes 100 jokes ↗ 🧒 Kids Jokes 80 jokes ↗ 🧸 Jokes for 5-Year-Olds 60 jokes ↗ 😄 Clean Jokes 100 jokes ↗ 💼 Work Jokes 80 jokes ↗ 🤓 Math Jokes 70 jokes ↗ 🦁 Animal Jokes 90 jokes ↗ 🐶 Dog Jokes 60 jokes ↗ 🐱 Cat Jokes 60 jokes ↗ 😏 Yo Mama Jokes 70 jokes ↗ 🎂 Birthday Jokes 70 jokes ↗ 🎄 Christmas Jokes 90 jokes ↗ 🏆 Best Jokes Ever 131 jokes ↗ 😂 Jokes to Tell Your Friends 80 jokes

😂 171 of the Funniest Jokes on the Internet

We pulled the top jokes from every single category onto one page. Skim it, laugh, copy your favorites — each one links to its full collection.

⭐ This Week's Editor Picks

1
I told my suitcase there's no vacation this year. Now I'm dealing with emotional baggage.
2
My therapist says I have a preoccupation with vengeance. We'll see about that.
3
I used to play piano by ear. Now I use my hands.
4
The past, present and future walked into a bar. It was tense.
5
I asked the librarian if the library had books on paranoia. She whispered, "They're right behind you."
6
A guy walked into a bar and lost the limbo contest. He raised the bar too high.
7
My wife told me to stop impersonating a flamingo. I had to put my foot down.
8
I'm reading a book about anti-gravity. It's impossible to put down.
9
People who take care of chickens are literally chicken tenders.
10
I stayed up all night wondering where the sun went. Then it dawned on me.
11
The man who invented autocorrect died last week. His funnel will be held next Monday.
12
I told my computer I needed a break, and now it won't stop sending me KitKat ads.
13
Never trust an atom. They make up everything.
14
What did the ocean say to the beach? Nothing, it just waved.
15
Why did the math book look sad? It had too many problems.
16
I would tell you a chemistry joke, but I know I wouldn't get a reaction.
17
Parallel lines have so much in common. It's a shame they'll never meet.
18
A plateau is the highest form of flattery.
19
I asked my dog what's two minus two. He said nothing.
20
What do you call a bear with no teeth? A gummy bear.
21
I'm on a whiskey diet. I've lost three days already.
22
The rotation of Earth really makes my day.
23
What did one hat say to the other? You stay here, I'll go on ahead.
24
I know a lot of jokes about retired people. None of them work.

👨 Best Dad Jokes

25
Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field.👨 More Dad Jokes
26
I'm reading a book about anti-gravity. It's impossible to put down.👨 More Dad Jokes
27
I used to hate facial hair, but then it grew on me.👨 More Dad Jokes
28
I told my wife she was drawing her eyebrows too high. She looked surprised.👨 More Dad Jokes
29
Why don't skeletons fight each other? They don't have the guts.👨 More Dad Jokes
30
What do you call a fake noodle? An impasta.👨 More Dad Jokes
31
How do you make a tissue dance? You put a little boogie in it.👨 More Dad Jokes

🚪 Best Knock Knock Jokes

32
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Boo.
Boo who?
Don't cry, it's just a joke.🚪 More Knock Knock Jokes
33
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Lettuce.
Lettuce who?
Lettuce in, it's freezing out here!🚪 More Knock Knock Jokes
34
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Interrupting cow.
Interrupting c—
MOO!🚪 More Knock Knock Jokes
35
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Tank.
Tank who?
You're welcome!🚪 More Knock Knock Jokes
36
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Nobel.
Nobel who?
No bell, that's why I knocked!🚪 More Knock Knock Jokes
37
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Olive.
Olive who?
Olive you and I don't care who knows it!🚪 More Knock Knock Jokes
38
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Cow says.
Cow says who?
No, a cow says moo!🚪 More Knock Knock Jokes

🎃 Best Halloween Jokes

39
Why didn't the skeleton go to the Halloween party? Because he had no body to go with.🎃 More Halloween Jokes
40
What do you call a witch who lives at the beach? A sand-witch.🎃 More Halloween Jokes
41
Why don't ghosts lie? Because you can see right through them.🎃 More Halloween Jokes
42
What room does a ghost not need? A living room.🎃 More Halloween Jokes
43
Why did the skeleton skip the party? He had nobody to dance with.🎃 More Halloween Jokes
44
What's a vampire's favorite fruit? A blood orange.🎃 More Halloween Jokes
45
Why did the zombie skip school? He felt rotten.🎃 More Halloween Jokes

⚡ Best One-Liner Jokes

46
I told my doctor I broke my arm in two places. He told me to stop going to those places.⚡ More One-Liner Jokes
47
The past, present, and future walked into a bar. It was tense.⚡ More One-Liner Jokes
48
I used to be indecisive. Now I'm not sure.⚡ More One-Liner Jokes
49
Knowledge is power, and power corrupts. Study hard and be evil.⚡ More One-Liner Jokes
50
A plateau is the highest form of flattery.⚡ More One-Liner Jokes
51
I always take life with a grain of salt. Plus a slice of lemon. And a shot of tequila.⚡ More One-Liner Jokes
52
Never trust an atom. They make up everything.⚡ More One-Liner Jokes

🌽 Best Corny Jokes

53
Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field.🌽 More Corny Jokes
54
What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Nacho cheese.🌽 More Corny Jokes
55
Why don't scientists trust atoms? Because they make up everything.🌽 More Corny Jokes
56
Why did the bicycle fall over? Because it was two-tired.🌽 More Corny Jokes
57
I'm reading a book about anti-gravity. It's impossible to put down.🌽 More Corny Jokes
58
What do you call a bear with no teeth? A gummy bear.🌽 More Corny Jokes
59
Why did the math book look sad? Because it had too many problems.🌽 More Corny Jokes

😅 Best Bad Jokes

60
What's red and smells like blue paint? Red paint.😅 More Bad Jokes
61
What's blue and doesn't weigh much? Light blue.😅 More Bad Jokes
62
What's brown and sticky? A stick.😅 More Bad Jokes
63
What did the farmer say after losing his tractor? 'Where's my tractor?'😅 More Bad Jokes
64
What's green and has wheels? Grass. I lied about the wheels.😅 More Bad Jokes
65
What's the hardest part of skydiving? The ground.😅 More Bad Jokes
66
What's the leading cause of dry skin? Towels.😅 More Bad Jokes

⚡ Best Short Jokes

67
I used to be indecisive. Now I'm not so sure.⚡ More Short Jokes
68
My fake plants died because I did not pretend to water them.⚡ More Short Jokes
69
Change is inevitable, except from a vending machine.⚡ More Short Jokes
70
I invented a new word: plagiarism.⚡ More Short Jokes
71
Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana.⚡ More Short Jokes
72
The rotation of Earth really makes my day.⚡ More Short Jokes
73
A backwards poet writes inverse.⚡ More Short Jokes

😄 Best Puns

74
I'm on a seafood diet. I see food and I eat it.😄 More Puns
75
The milk got named employee of the month. It was legend-dairy.😄 More Puns
76
I relish that you mustard the courage to ketchup with me.😄 More Puns
77
Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana.😄 More Puns
78
A boiled egg for breakfast is hard to beat.😄 More Puns
79
Why did the banana go to the doctor? It wasn't peeling well.😄 More Puns
80
Why did the tomato blush? It saw the salad dressing.😄 More Puns

🤔 Best What Do You Call Jokes

81
What do you call a fake noodle? An impasta.🤔 More What Do You Call Jokes
82
What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Nacho cheese.🤔 More What Do You Call Jokes
83
What do you call a sad strawberry? A blueberry.🤔 More What Do You Call Jokes
84
What do you call a pig that does karate? A pork chop.🤔 More What Do You Call Jokes
85
What do you call a potato that hesitates? A hesi-tater.🤔 More What Do You Call Jokes
86
What do you call an everyday potato? A commentator.🤔 More What Do You Call Jokes
87
What do you call a small potato? A small fry.🤔 More What Do You Call Jokes

🧒 Best Kids Jokes

88
What do you call a fish without eyes? A fsh.🧒 More Kids Jokes
89
Why did the cow go to outer space? To see the moooon.🧒 More Kids Jokes
90
What do you call a bear with no teeth? A gummy bear.🧒 More Kids Jokes
91
Why do bees have sticky hair? Because they use honeycombs.🧒 More Kids Jokes
92
What do you call an alligator in a vest? An investigator.🧒 More Kids Jokes
93
Why did the teddy bear skip dessert? Because she was stuffed.🧒 More Kids Jokes
94
Why did the pony get sent to his room? He wouldn't stop horsing around.🧒 More Kids Jokes

🧸 Best Jokes for 5-Year-Olds

95
What is a cat's favorite color? Pur-ple.🧸 More Jokes for 5-Year-Olds
96
Why do fish live in saltwater? Because pepper makes them sneeze.🧸 More Jokes for 5-Year-Olds
97
What do you call a pig that does karate? A pork chop.🧸 More Jokes for 5-Year-Olds
98
What animal can jump higher than a house? All of them, houses can't jump.🧸 More Jokes for 5-Year-Olds
99
What do cows sing at birthday parties? Happy birthday to moo.🧸 More Jokes for 5-Year-Olds
100
What do you call two birds in love? Tweethearts.🧸 More Jokes for 5-Year-Olds
101
Why did the elephant paint himself different colors? So he could hide in the crayon box.🧸 More Jokes for 5-Year-Olds

😄 Best Clean Jokes

102
I told my wife she was drawing her eyebrows too high. She looked surprised.😄 More Clean Jokes
103
Why did the golfer bring two pairs of pants? In case he got a hole in one.😄 More Clean Jokes
104
What do you call a pony with a cough? A little hoarse.😄 More Clean Jokes
105
I'm reading a book about anti-gravity. It's impossible to put down.😄 More Clean Jokes
106
What did the janitor say when he jumped out of the closet? Supplies.😄 More Clean Jokes
107
Why did the bicycle fall over? Because it was two-tired.😄 More Clean Jokes
108
Why do we tell actors to break a leg? Because every play has a cast.😄 More Clean Jokes

💼 Best Work Jokes

109
Meetings are where minutes are kept and hours are lost.💼 More Work Jokes
110
What do you call a meeting that could have been an email? Tuesday.💼 More Work Jokes
111
You're on mute. You're on mute. YOU'RE ON MUTE.💼 More Work Jokes
112
Why did the coworker bring a ladder to the meeting? To take things to the next level.💼 More Work Jokes
113
Need to end a meeting early? Say 'let's take this offline' and start walking.💼 More Work Jokes
114
Why did the meeting break up with the calendar invite? It felt double-booked.💼 More Work Jokes
115
A status meeting is where everyone explains why last week's plan didn't work.💼 More Work Jokes

🤓 Best Math Jokes

116
Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 8 9.🤓 More Math Jokes
117
Why did the math book look so sad? Because it had way too many problems.🤓 More Math Jokes
118
Why do plants hate math? Because it gives them square roots.🤓 More Math Jokes
119
What did 0 say to 8? Nice belt.🤓 More Math Jokes
120
How do you make the number seven even? Just take away the S.🤓 More Math Jokes
121
Why can't a nose be 12 inches long? Because then it would be a foot.🤓 More Math Jokes
122
What do you call a number that can't sit still? A roamin' numeral.🤓 More Math Jokes

🦁 Best Animal Jokes

123
Why did the cow go to space? To see the moooon.🦁 More Animal Jokes
124
What do you call a sleeping bull? A bulldozer.🦁 More Animal Jokes
125
What do you call a pig that knows karate? A pork chop.🦁 More Animal Jokes
126
Why can't you trust a pig with a secret? It'll squeal.🦁 More Animal Jokes
127
Why do cows have hooves instead of feet? Because they lactose.🦁 More Animal Jokes
128
Why did the chicken cross the playground? To get to the other slide.🦁 More Animal Jokes
129
Why did the turkey join the band? Because it had the drumsticks.🦁 More Animal Jokes

🐶 Best Dog Jokes

130
What do you call a dog magician? A labracadabrador.🐶 More Dog Jokes
131
Why did the dog sit in the shade? Because he didn't want to be a hot dog.🐶 More Dog Jokes
132
Why did the dog chase his own tail? He was trying to make ends meet.🐶 More Dog Jokes
133
What did the dog say when he sat on sandpaper? "Ruff!"🐶 More Dog Jokes
134
What kind of dog keeps the best time? A watchdog.🐶 More Dog Jokes
135
What do you call a cold dog? A chili dog.🐶 More Dog Jokes
136
How does a dog with no nose smell? Terrible.🐶 More Dog Jokes

🐱 Best Cat Jokes

137
What do you call a pile of kittens? A meow-ntain.🐱 More Cat Jokes
138
What do you call a cat that wins a dog show? A cat-has-trophy.🐱 More Cat Jokes
139
Why did the cat sit on the computer? To keep an eye on the mouse.🐱 More Cat Jokes
140
Why are cats bad storytellers? Because they only have one tail.🐱 More Cat Jokes
141
What's a cat's favorite color? Purr-ple.🐱 More Cat Jokes
142
What do cats eat for breakfast? Mice Krispies.🐱 More Cat Jokes
143
What do you call a cat that always gets her way? Purr-suasive.🐱 More Cat Jokes

🎂 Best Birthday Jokes

144
Why did the birthday cake go to the doctor? It was feeling crumby.🎂 More Birthday Jokes
145
What did the birthday cake say to the fork? You want a piece of me?🎂 More Birthday Jokes
146
What did the little candle say to the big candle? I'm going out tonight.🎂 More Birthday Jokes
147
What kind of cake do you eat in the bathtub? A sponge cake.🎂 More Birthday Jokes
148
Why did the birthday cake visit the dentist? It lost a filling.🎂 More Birthday Jokes
149
What did the cake say when it got a compliment? That's sweet of you.🎂 More Birthday Jokes
150
What did the frosting say to the cake? I've got you covered.🎂 More Birthday Jokes

🎄 Best Christmas Jokes

151
What do you call Santa's little helpers? Subordinate Clauses.🎄 More Christmas Jokes
152
Why does Santa always come down the chimney? Because it soots him.🎄 More Christmas Jokes
153
What do you call people who are afraid of Santa? Claustrophobic.🎄 More Christmas Jokes
154
Why does Santa have three gardens? So he can ho, ho, ho.🎄 More Christmas Jokes
155
How much did Santa pay for his sleigh? Nothing, it was on the house.🎄 More Christmas Jokes
156
What do you call a broke Santa? Saint Nickel-less.🎄 More Christmas Jokes
157
What do you call Santa when he takes a break? Santa Pause.🎄 More Christmas Jokes

🏆 Best Best Jokes Ever

158
A guy walks into a library and asks for books on paranoia. The librarian whispers, "They're right behind you..."🏆 More Best Jokes Ever
159
My therapist says I have a preoccupation with vengeance. We'll see about that.🏆 More Best Jokes Ever
160
I told my wife she was drawing her eyebrows too high. She looked surprised.🏆 More Best Jokes Ever
161
The past, present, and future walked into a bar. It was tense.🏆 More Best Jokes Ever
162
I stayed up all night wondering where the sun went. Then it dawned on me.🏆 More Best Jokes Ever
163
A plateau is the highest form of flattery.🏆 More Best Jokes Ever
164
I told my suitcase there's no vacation this year. Now I'm dealing with emotional baggage.🏆 More Best Jokes Ever

😂 Best Jokes to Tell Your Friends

165
Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field.😂 More Jokes to Tell Your Friends
166
Why don't scientists trust atoms? Because they make up everything.😂 More Jokes to Tell Your Friends
167
What do you call a fish without eyes? A fsh.😂 More Jokes to Tell Your Friends
168
Why don't eggs tell each other jokes? They'd crack each other up.😂 More Jokes to Tell Your Friends
169
What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Nacho cheese.😂 More Jokes to Tell Your Friends
170
Why did the bicycle fall over? Because it was two-tired.😂 More Jokes to Tell Your Friends
171
What do you call a bear with no teeth? A gummy bear.😂 More Jokes to Tell Your Friends

Frequently Asked Questions

What are the funniest jokes of all time?

The classics that never miss: "Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field," "I'm reading a book about anti-gravity — it's impossible to put down," and the entire dad jokes category. See our full ranked list on the Best Jokes Ever page.

What is a good joke to tell friends?

Short, punchy, and easy to remember wins. One-liners like "The past, present and future walked into a bar. It was tense" land every time. We have a whole page of jokes to tell your friends — most also work over text.

Are these jokes clean and family-friendly?

Yes. Every category on FunnyJokes.fun is rated PG or cleaner — safe for work, school, and family dinners. Our dark jokes category sticks to clever gallows wordplay, never anything graphic or mean.

How often do you add new jokes?

We refresh categories weekly, rotate a joke of the day every 24 hours, and publish seasonal collections for Halloween, Christmas, and other holidays.